5/23/2011

What a tumultuous time. I feel a like everyone does some times... at the end of my rope. This pregnancy has been the hardest physically, spiritually and emotionally that I've ever had. Today was the straw. So when one feels like it's it's the end of their rope their supposed to tie a knot and hold on right?. . . right?
As I've struggled I keep having this nagging feeling....count your blessing....think of the positives. But (I'm not proud to admit it) I've just been too dang tired. Maybe if I would have heeded earlier I wouldn't be where I'm at. But I believe that the Lord is mercifully, and I'm willing to heed now.

*I have three healthy (mostly--Emily has had a fever since Saturday morning) children. Although it was a rough winter it wasn't a rough asthma winter. I am so very grateful for that.

*My husband has a wonderful job. He's respected and he's good at what he does. He provides for our family and we have never gone without.

*My husband. He is so patient, so sympathetic, so loving, so selfless, so steady. He's had to pick up a lot lately and he's never murmured or complained. Just the opposite. He's usually asking me to let him do more.

*My home. My air conditioning. My cooler works well. With 95+ temps for what seems like forever now I am still feeling nice and cool in my house. I'm grateful it's worked and worked well. I haven't had to deal with waiting on a repairman or being uncomfortable in that area.

*Food. Although I often feel it's my nemesis these past few months, I'm grateful I've got it and if something ever does sound good I live in a place where it's not hard to find whatever my mind is fixating on.

*Prayer. I can always kneel down. Sometimes that's all I've been able to do to "control" my situation.

I'll try and do more later...